Coaching and Mentoring - From Ordinary to Extraordinary

Coaching Tips- What to Do or Say When Someone you Know Dies- Sharing is Really Caring

What to do or say when someone you know dies sharing is caring. This is a very real problem for most of us. We feel just as lost as the survivor of the dead loved one. We are lost for words. We are also vulnerable to our fears. 

Death ranks high on our list of fears almost as high as public speaking.

As someone, who has worked in hospice and who is a public speaker, I am somewhat of an expert on these fears.

Public speaking gets easier with practice and with the passion, you express for your topic.

 

With dying, we can practice our expressing our emotions and understanding our fears by writing a brief letter.

When someone you know dies, write a brief letter, not an e-mail, but a real letter to one of his or her survivors describing the impact – great or small- the person had on your life.

They will feel good reading your letter and you will feel good writing it.

 

Your fear of death slowly decreases as you practice sharing your feelings with others. By sharing you will learn to celebrate your life!!

 

3 Easy Ways to Relieve your Depressed or Sad Feelings That Really Work

 

 

3 easy ways to relieve your depressed or sad feelings that really work! I use these methods because I am a people watcher.

The next time you are depressed or sad, do something to cheer some one up.

1)   look

2)   listen

3)   take action

 

In the process, two people will feel better!

Try to do this in secret; you will feel the extra boost of cheer!

 

Look- Look around you- The people you see. Use your imagination. What would cheer them up?

They may at first glance seem happy and well off, look longer and deeper; are there signs of sadness there? Think about what you could do to help them. Make eye contact and smile. “That is all”

 

Listen- Listen to the people- What are they really saying? Can you give them any encouragement? Can you say you understand? Can you be a little bit empathetic? “That is all”

 

Take action- Do not expect to fix people or their situations. Only they can do things for themselves, they have the control not you!

Send someone a cheery e-mail include a lovely picture or a fun quote.

Drop off a cheery card on their desk or doorway.

Give a single flower- a rose is great, but a carnation or a daisy is just as enduring. For a wonderful impact, try a single sunflower with a cheery, smiling note attached.

If you prefer you can give a small box of chocolates, or my favorite and signature goodie a roll of flavored Lifesavers.

You can create all sorts of great notes and encouragements to attach to a roll of Lifesavers.

You see in the process of helping and caring for another person you loose sight of your problem and sadness just for a short time. You will feel better as well.

 

With your act of kindness and caring, you really do help two people!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

Memories Should be Savored like a Wonderful Meal

 

 

Memories Should be Savored like a Wonderful Meal, they are also non-fattening.

 

Have you ever considered memories as gourmet meals? Those times you celebrated and thoroughly enjoyed yourself and life.

 

Here is how to do the savoring!

 

Find some nice stationary, you still have some, I hope. I have a reason to use this stationery! Ok, now list the ten most wonderful moments in your life, so far!

 

For example- memory jogger:

Going to the prom

Graduating from high school / college

Getting married

Holding your first born

Getting your first car

Moving into your first home / apartment

 

The list goes on, these are just  suggestions.

The reason for the nice stationery is to enhance the memory writing as something incredible and special. Take some time to think back to each of these memories, relive how wonderful they were. Now hang this list on your refrigerator door where you can see it every day, all day.

 

These memories are times you enjoyed. Savor the emotions, that remembering brings back. Savor the planning that went into the making of that memory.

Life is good, your memories show it!

 

You can be happy, you proved it!

 

Now my coaching challenge to you is to add present memories to your journal so in a few months you can remove this wonderful list and replace it will a new improved one!

 

 

Respecting Yourself Starts with Respecting an Elder

 

Respecting yourself starts with respecting an elder, here is a few easy steps to get the job done.

 

We all need to take a better look at how we respect our selves. How are we as role models for our children, employees, friends and our community? How do we feel when we look at our selves in the mirror in the morning, are we just satisfied with our everyday performance or can we improve to make a difference in our lives and in the lives of those around us?

One positive way to increase our own self-respect is to gain the respect of our elders.

How do we do this? Simple, talk to them, help them feel needed again.

 

Take on hour to talk with an elderly person who is not a member of your family.

Ask about his or her greatest experiences in life. Be prepared for a wealth of information and emotions.

Ask if you can audio tape or use a digital voice recorder to record the conversation.  This personal history will be an important document for the person’s family member so offer to give them a transcript.

You can write the conversation down, in an outline form, much like taking notes at school. Then transcribe on quality stationary and give it to the person as a gift.

 

Remember allow the elder just to talk, or answer your questions, let them reminisce the old memories.

 

What is your part in this?

Show genuine interest

Show appreciation and gratitude

They will be your teacher, take this opportunity to learn.

This may be the only chance you get!

 

You will come away with a different perspective of the elderly, a respect for yourself for the action of calm reverence, and your ability to be open to a new learning experience.

 

 

This is another Coaching Moment from the Zensage.

 

 

Coaching- Climbing the Ladder of Success Here is What You Can Do, Part 1

 

Part 1

As you climb the ladder of success, you do not need to be in business to be successful. Your life is full of successes,

consciously reach down to bring others with you. These others can be friends, family members or associates.

Success in every direction in life is much sweeter and more meaningful when it is shared with others.

 

• Why Coaches- Coach: everyone is a coach in some form. A parent coaches their child; a family member coaches another family member. We want to leave some sort of legacy and footprint behind to make us feel productive and loved
• Reason behind Mentoring: We all like to teach, we get feedback when we show some one else how to do something or how to make something just a little bit easier. There is a sense of satisfaction and purpose when we do this.

 

 

Valentine's Day- A Day Set Aside to Express Love

 

A day that is set aside to express love.

 

Oh my, how sad, we have to schedule love expression. Hey, I know we are all busy but…

 

 

Here is my valentine to all my friends and “loves”!!

 

Let’s make love contagious, and an everyday spontaneous feeling!!

 

Finding purpose in life- personal community involvement leads to networking and self –confidence.

 

Finding purpose in life- personal community involvement leads to networking and self –confidence. 

As most of us are rewriting our resumes, we look for new ideas and new roads to travel to increase our marketability.

 

Joining a club or organization that interests you and take an active role in it right from the start will add definite credibility and position to your resume. This will also make your life much more purposeful. 

Several years ago, I joined Toastmasters International. I wanted to learn how to effectively communicate. I also wanted to be a better leader and businessperson. I have resolved my fear of public speaking, increased my leadership skills, gained self-confidence and met some of the most influencing people in my community. I freely network with these people and contribute of my time and expertise. I am finding purpose in my life.

 

You can do this too, by investigating a club or organization that interests you or will teach some thing new.

Always be looking for people to coach and mentor you.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Living Life on Purpose- Eliminate One Bad Habit

 

Living life on purpose- eliminate one bad habit can make life a great deal better.

 

You can start to live your life on purpose by making a serious and diligent effort to eliminate one bad habit in your life. 

I will share with you one that I am working on. 

I have this very bad habit of finishing people’s sentences or comments.  When they pause, I am impatient and try to finish their attempts to make a point or comment.   I tended to rationalize my conduct by stating that as a writer I was always one or two thoughts ahead of some one. Alternatively, that I just had an intuition of what they were going to say.

 

No matter, people would be down right upset with me for interrupting them. I was not invited to parties anymore, among other things.

I have learned to stop interrupting and become much more patient with people. I started to really listen to what they were saying and hold my comments until later. My relationships have increased and so have my communication skills. 

You must have at least one bad habit that you can eliminate that will change your life and the way you are persevered by others.

 

Please leave a comment; I would like to know how I could help you.

 

 

Celebrate Rose Week Feb. 7th - 14th

 

 

Celebrate Rose Week Feb 7^th – 14^th 

Do something very special!!

 

We all love to be appreciated!!

Here is a great way to appreciate a friend!

 

Each day for the week of Feb 7^th through Feb 14^th, give a single rose to someone in your life who deserves special recognition.

 

Now as an alternative for a rose, give a small box of chocolates or a scented candle or even scented soap.

These wonderful thoughtful gifts are great even the men in your life.  

 

You can start a tradition that can go on for years. This is a small price to pay for the wonderful things your friends have done.

 

This is extra special and very effective if the person has not been regularly noticed for their good works!!

 

Self- Control Means Being Tough on Yourself but Gentle on Others

 

 

Self- Control means being tough on yourself but gentle on others this is sometimes not easy to do.

 

In all aspects of your life, make it a challenge to learn to be tough on yourself but go gentle on others! By being tough on yourself, I mean you should set extremely high standards and values for yourself. Your time and skills are very valuable. Use careful consideration when acting on things. You are quality workmanship and you should expect nothing less of yourself.  However, as a manager of your self, you should be aware that it is unwise to try to change others. By being slow to judge others who do not reach your high standards is a way to foster self –control and improve your management abilities.

You must understand that every one has their own perception of excellence. Encourage never criticize.

 

1)   Your personal standards can be increased by the way your control clutter in your life.

2)   How you let others into your personal space, is an other challenge. An open door policy really means an open mind.

3)   Always strive for integrity at work. Remember trust is earned.

4)   In your home, teaching your children is paramount teach with love.

5)    Being tough on yourself generates self- worth, self- confidence, self- discipline and self- control.